The 87th Edition
I can’t stop thinking about confidence. I wrote a Weekly Reframe the other week about it. But more specifically, I keep thinking about what sits on the other side of it:
FEAR!
Something to Think About
Fear keeps you small; confidence expands everything.
Something to Ask Yourself
Where in your life are you playing small simply because you’re scared? And what are you actually afraid of?
Personal Lesson
I’ve been scared so many times in my life. There is nothing wrong with feeling afraid.
I was afraid when I left my corporate job in 2021 with no real plan and decided to qualify as a Personal Trainer. I was afraid when I moved to Bristol to start building a PT business from scratch. I was afraid when that business was failing. I was afraid when the money ran out.
I was afraid when I had to go back to the corporate world, scraping around for something stable after publicly announcing I’d left to “enter the world of Health & Fitness”… “my true calling”.
Afraid of what people might think. Afraid I’d look like I’d failed and I wasn’t cut out for doing my own thing.
I was afraid again when I was made redundant after moving back to London. Afraid when I didn’t know what was next, and when I had to lean on coaching just to stay afloat.
And, again, I was afraid in 2024 when I left corporate for good to go all in on this dream one final time.
No safety net. No guarantees.
Fear has been a constant.
But so has confidence.
Not necessarily loud or delusional confidence, but it’s been there steering the ship.
Every decision I’ve made to take action, over and over again, to act as if I could handle what came next.
To back myself despite the fear and uncertainty. To move forward while scared.
I am not where I am now (surviving on a passion business – fulfilling a dream) because I was fearless.
I’m here because I refused to let fear dictate my actions.
It is because of confidence that I’ve made to where I currently am, and despite the fear.
Running – Life’s Metaphor
Every race and all of your training is a battle between fear and confidence.
If fear dominates, you shrink. If confidence leads, you run and race freely.
Running constantly forces you to choose: retreat into fear, or lean into belief.
Final Thoughts
If I could give everyone in the world something, it would be CONFIDENCE.
Here’s what I think I know:
fear never leaves. It just changes.
You will feel fear when you start the business.
You will feel fear when you commit to the race.
You will feel fear when you put yourself out there.
You will feel fear when you go all in.
The question is not how do I eliminate fear.
The question is: do you trust yourself enough to act anyway?
Confidence isn’t the absence of fear.
It’s authority over it.
Read that again and let it sink in…
We are living in a time where so many capable people are paralysed by self doubt.
Afraid of judgement.
Afraid of being wrong.
Afraid of looking stupid.
And so they stay where they are.
If I could give give you one thing right now as you read this email, it wouldn’t be talent, or opportunity, or privilege, or anything else…
It would be the ability to say “I’m scared, and I’m doing it anyway!”
That is honestly where EVERYTHING starts.
Confidence is not a personality trait. It’s a choice.
The moment you choose to back yourself, even while shaking, your life starts to expand.
Choose to tell yourself you can do it.
Choose to think of the positive outcomes.
Choose to be optimistic.
Ask yourself “why not!?” “Why not me!?”